Confronting Compassion Fatigue

The world we live in faces many tragedies and injustices. It can be hard to endure caring about everything that needs our care and attention. A true tragedy of all this is that those of us who care the most are beaten down more by all that is happening around us. As such, we need to figure out ways to endure this state of being (as it shows no signs of slowing down) and find strategies to still feel like we're making a positive impact in our lives.

Finding Balance

A common axiom nowadays, but it bears repeating; we must find a balance and harmony that works for our lives. Bringing together work, life, sleep, diet, exercise, fun, and committing to the causes we care about. The coalescing of all these things will be unique to each of us, and we can't base our lives on someone else's model. We can find inspiration from tips and tricks, but it will never work to always be comparing ourselves to those around us. When it comes to compassion fatigue, it may feel like we can never do as much as other people, and that can bring us down. 

Seeking Focus

There is a lot going in that we can now have insight into that we never had before. We can be witnessing, engaged, and assisting in a cause anywhere in the world. With this gift of access, may come an overwhelming feeling of there being too much for us to handle. It's important to find focus so that we can give more of ourselves and better help to the cause at hand. That can still mean working globally if you like, it may also mean working more locally and hands on. It could be working for environmental sustainability, or women's rights, or fighting homelessness. Spreading ourselves and our limited emotional energy too thin won't be for the best in the long run.

Determining Satisfaction

Many of us (myself included) tend to want immediate, major change on the issues we care about. But unfortunately, sustainable change often takes time, effort, and coalitions rather than just a radical shift because some people want it. So we need to find contentment in the small victories and milestones, and by making positive impacts in our daily lives. Helping one person, changing one person's mind, securing your first funding grant. It all matters and it all will help you towards your ultimate goal. 

No one needs to be a paragon of a sole issue, but there is value in focus and balance. There is also value in our emotions, empathy, and having an open heart. It can help to compel us to do the right thing and persist even when the going gets tough.

I feel this quote is a good place to end on and captures the spirit of this post well:

"Do what you can, with what you have, where you are" - Theodore Roosevelt

Guilty Pleasures? Activities That You Shouldn't Be Embarrassed of Engaging With

We are all familiar with the stereotypes that revolve around activities such as gaming, cosplay, and comics. They often come hand in hand with what has generally been assumed to be a rather negative connotation: the geek or the nerd. But it’s time to reclaim the term geek and everything that may come hand in hand with it! The skyrocketing popularity of online forums and social media has made us realize that those of us invested in franchises and brands such as World of Warcraft, Star Trek, Zelda, Marvel and Warhammer aren’t so alone after all. There’s a reason that the companies pumping out these games and merchandise have stood the test of time: they are popular, and thus they sell. So, if you find that you are labeled a geek or nerd because of your interests, take pride in it. Here are a few stereotypically “geeky” hobbies that you should never be ashamed of engaging in.

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Gaming

When people think of gaming, the image of an isolated, socially inept teen spending hours in their room with a headset on often springs to mind. But the reality is that individuals of all ages, interests, and habits engage with gaming. It’s not all too surprising seeing as this market covers so many genres. There are a whole host of options out there, so it’s almost guaranteed that there’s a game that even the starkest anti-gamer would genuinely enjoy. For those who want pure escapism, there are role-playing games such as Final Fantasy. The latest edition can be easily downloaded at www.finalfantasyxvapp.com and started up in a matter of minutes. This game allows you to assume the role of a protagonist in a fantasy world, completing a whole host of tasks, quests, and battles. For those who are more social, there are MMO games. MMO stands for Massively Multiplayer Online. You can play against other gamers from around the world, engaging with people you would have never otherwise met and collaborating to succeed and move up levels. Alternatively, you can battle against one another, testing your skill against other real-life players. If you enjoy riddles and quizzes, you can try out puzzle games. These range from the traditional and simple (such as Tetris) to the more modern day and specialized (such as Big Brain Academy). Whatever your interests, there will be something perfect for you.

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Cosplay

If you are unfamiliar with cosplay, it is simply the act of dressing up as a character from a film, book, or video game. Most people opt to dress as someone from Japanese anime or manga in particular. Cosplay has experienced a huge explosion in popularity since people are now more capable of sharing images of their brilliant costumes on social media feeds. Facebook, Instagram, and Twitter are constantly awash with individuals cosplaying common characters (such as Link from Zelda, Deadpool, and Harley Quinn) to the more obscure (such as Miranda from Legend of Dragoon or characters from much smaller fandoms). Cosplay is extremely rewarding, as it allows you to live and breathe your passion. You can also meet up with individuals of similar interests at conventions, being able to bond over your outfits. What’s more? You get to express your creativity freely.

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Comic Books

Comic books. If you’re into them, chances are that you are already fully aware of your interest and have piles and piles of common and rare copies filling your home. But if you’re new to collecting comics, here’s a quick debrief. A hobby is essentially the telling of a story through sequential art. They’ve been around for years, but the most commonly acknowledged and successful type are those telling tales of superheroes and anime characters. The Marvel franchise is perhaps one of the most recognized around the world, with rare copies selling for millions of dollars. An original copy of Action Comics #1 (which introduces Superman to the World) sold for $3.2 million. So if you get your hands on the right collector’s item, you really can be in to make a profit. Go to specialist stores, root through wares being sold at car boot sales and keep an eye out at local auctions, just in case something astounding comes up.

As you can see, there are plenty of benefits of engaging with stereotypically “geeky” hobbies, and there are hundreds and thousands of others out there who think that these activities are just as great as you praise them to be. So never be ashamed of your interests and embrace what you enjoy.

Why It Pays To Be A Geek Later On In Life

“Blessed are the geeks, for they shall inherit the earth.” It’s a slogan you’ll find on many t-shirts or kitchen item, and never has it been more true. You might have felt like being the class geek or school nerd was a bad thing in high school, but once you’ve left school and gym class is far behind you - there’s a whole world out there for you. Being a geek in later life is no bad thing, and could help you to push yourself further than you could imagine.

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Learn a language, enjoy better career success

Learning a language will benefit you for many reasons, and one of the most important could be your career. Did you know that Mark Zuckerberg has been learning Mandarin? He’s just one example of the many successful businessmen who are bilingual. Learning a second language could boost your career and open up a whole new set of doors for you. As something you can do at any age to widen your prospects, why not take some time each day during your morning commute or lunch break to start learning another language?

Making the most of that thick-skin

If you were a geek in high school, you might look back on your younger years as some of the worst of your life - and who can blame you? From being rejected by the opposite sex to verbal taunts - you were probably counting down the days until school was over. A lot of what we go through as kids can help shape who we are as adults, and if you had a particularly tough time then it’s likely you’ve developed a great thick-skin. Being able to rise up against the setbacks and the rejection will make you more determined to succeed in your endeavors, an important quality to have when setting out to achieve your goals.

Achieve your career goals

If you want to go far in life, you’re going to need to keep learning new things. You may not be ready to complete a masters degree at 22, but these days it’s never too late or too difficult to start learning again. You could decide to master lean manufacturing at any age if you feel that it’s the next step in your career by completing an online degree. Being able to continue to learn and push yourself to achieve new things will help you to achieve your career goals and put you ahead of the rest.

Having interests that make you happy

A lot of being a geek is having interests in things that others might not understand or find bewildering, but embracing these things will make you a much happier person. Whether you love to watch geeky TV shows or have a favorite computer game, having a passion and an interest in something will make your life much more fulfilled.

Wanting to better yourself through learning is a fantastic way to help you progress in your career and fulfill your ambitions. Even if you’re not your typical geek, it’s not a bad personality trait to have to help you reach your goals. What do you want to achieve in life? Geek out and go get it.

Why Fashion Shouldn't Make You Suffer

I had this random thought recently, as there have been a good bit of discussions going on about how fashion can be oppressive in that it prohibits people from being able to perform an outdated, noninclusive image of "professionalism" or decency (this sentiment is captured well here).

I work in an environment where you dress for the day and everyone is able to express themselves as they like. Some dress up, some dress down, it all depends on how they're feeling and what they want to wear, versus the limited options in a formal, business professional environment. That isn't to say that this sort of attire has no place, but it as the baseline or assumed dress for most occasions feels ridiculous. We dress to the day so if the day calls for it, then we'll meet the expectations of what we need to wear.

I hate the idea of how many people out there get reprimanded, fired, or don't even get in the door because they don't have the appropriate attire. We should open ourselves up to allow people to dress and work however is most comfortable for them so they can perform to their full potential, whether that is in work or at school. And not dismiss people simply because of their outward appearances or assume anything about them. We've seen so many examples of schools sending (mostly young women) home because of "indecent" attire. This makes so many assumptions on behalf of the students, their peers, and it takes that student out of class for a foolish reason.

Fashion shouldn't make you suffer. Clothes shouldn't feel like they're weighing you down, make you feel uncomfortable, or don't feel like they express your true self. You shouldn't have to endure pain in heels in order to attend an event. You shouldn't have to invest a lot of money in clothes that are required only because of a shallow sense of "always doing it that way". Thankfully, it feels like we're making some progress here, where people can break free of gender binaries and go out into the world as their true selves. We still have a lot of work to do, but I see instances of this growth a lot, albeit in my small pockets of the world.

I hope you help support this movement in your communities. The world will be better off for it. And you might just make some unconventional connections.

History is Human

As a history major in college, I've always had an affinity and appreciation for the story of our world. I often visit museums and monuments, taking moments to look into the context that lead us to now. Certainly nowadays this is a contentious issue in terms of who we decide to erect statues to and which ones we decide to take down.

While we create our collective memory of the past (meaning it is subject to our whims and limited by what we have left to examine), there is a universal thread that hit me recently; history is human.

We often exalt the figures of the past, making it hard to imagine and relate to them (especially since we don't have many realistic depictions of people until recently with the advent of video with color). But what is sobering to realize, is that these people we make monuments to and learn about in books, were just that, people. They were humans figuring out their way in the world as best they could, often making mistakes, and victims to their emotions. They made meaning as best they could with what they had, and did as well as they could muster with what they had. The impressive part is that they survived, thrived, expanded, and made it possible for us to be here in an amazing time to be alive (albeit at great cost and certainly we are in an imperfect world still). 

It makes me feel like we can give these historical figures a bit of a break. They did all they could to improve life in their time (and often succeeded), we need to continue the tradition and use the incredible tools at our disposal to expand the common good. To be clear, I don't mean this to say we should give people free passes for the awful things they did. We should not honor people who embodied any sort of hateful ideology. With that being said though, history has always been made by humans working hard and working together. And while we are the cause of many of our own problems, we are also the solution to those problems.

People will be learning about our time in the future. What do we want them to say?

Book Review: The Last Lecture

"Experience is what you get when you didn't get what you wanted"

I recently just finished the book that follows up on the "last lecture" by fellow proud nerd, Randy Pausch, nearly a decade after his death (he passed in July 2008), and a decade to the day after the now famous lecture. I've been getting knee deep in death lately (which seems to be a trend, especially with some of my movie reviews). I've been watching The Leftovers, where coping with loss is a major theme. The Last Lecture is the dream scenario for many in that show, where someone knows the end is coming, and is more able to cope and prepare, and tell the people around him the impact they've had on him, as well as the future he hopes for.

The book expands on the speech, and reflects on it. I had always heard about this video, but never really delved into it. I sat down to watch it after I read the book and in preparation of this post. I'm glad I did. It's nice to look back long after he has passed to keep moving his message on. It's a simple, positive one that cuts through a lot of the cynicism and negativity around us. While I can certainly acknowledge his upbringing gave him a lot of benefits, simple advice sometimes helps to affirm what we all as humans should strive for.

I love the quote above, as it is something I'm currently grappling with and have had to come to terms with in the past. I look forward to the clarity of hindsight as I move forward (if only it was given to us in the moment).

As I said, I've been watching The Leftovers, which deals with loss, and I think we should all also be a lot more grateful for the time we have with those we care about, and we should tell them what they mean to us. I got married when it may have been sooner than some were expecting. But I was ready to marry my wife when I proposed, and I didn't want to wait any longer to be her husband.

I encourage you to give the video another viewing if you haven't seen it in a while. It's a simple, pure, and will help you to reflect on where you are, where you've been, and where you want to go. It will also help to honor a man who loved life, and lived it fully.

College Rejection: You Need These Inspiring Alternatives

For many young people, getting a higher education at college or university is the first and most common-sense choice. However, life doesn’t always go to plan and there may be things that get in the way of you achieving your goals. For example, illness could get in the way of you finishing your exams or you may be rejected by your desired colleges. It can seem like your world is falling apart and you may not be able to see the light at the end of the tunnel. But, not being able to get a degree right now doesn’t mean you’re out of options. Take a look at these alternatives for some inspiration on what to do next.

Start a Business

Did you know that 14% of the current American workforce is self-employed and operate a business entirely on their own? Working for yourself has never been more possible than it is now. In fact, thanks to the wonders of the internet, it doesn’t cost much to set up a business either. There’s now far more advantage in operating an ecommerce store than there is a bricks and mortar store, not to mention all the costs you’ll avoid. If you think you need a degree to manage a business well and make a good earning, think again. Names like Richard Branson, Walt Disney and Bill Gates come to mind, none of which had a degree. Sometimes, all it takes is a good idea, passion and some perseverance.

Community College

There seems to be some kind of snobbery when it comes to the thought of community college, but there shouldn’t be. Learning is learning, no matter where you are or how you do it. You may not be able to gain the type of degree you were hoping for at community college, but that doesn’t mean it won’t be of use. In fact, there are many benefits to going straight from high school to community college. The first is that it doesn’t cost anywhere near as much as a degree does, so it’s more affordable for families on a low income. The second is that it makes the transition into a degree much more bearable. You’ll learn what it takes to study intensely at a gradual pace, rather than being thrown right in the deep end. See what’s on offer and you could come away with everything you need to start a career where you can climb the ladder. You may even find that you beat your fellow students, who have a degree, to the same spot.

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Trade Work

If all you want is a career that will remain secure for the foreseeable future, going into a trade is an ideal choice. Trades like, building, plumbing or electrics will always be of value to people. When you’ve developed the skills you need and have the certifications to prove it, you have two choices. You can either work for a trades company or startup your own business. Because you’ll have skills that are in high demand, you’ll have a certain amount of flexibility. You can often do your vocational training at a technical school. The courses are full-time and affordable and once you’re finished you’re likely to be making the same kind of salary as someone with a degree, if not more. One of the other benefits is that you’re almost guaranteed a job as soon as you finish your studies, unlike graduates who are just leaving college. It often takes a graduate up to year to find a suitable job because there are so many people applying for the same roles.

Follow Your Passion

Do you enjoy painting? Why not try and sell some of your work? Following a passion doesn’t just have to be a hobby. These days, there are many people interested in bespoke work because everyone wants to be unique. It’s much easier now to turn a passion into a salary. Whether you enjoy writing, creating music or sports, there will be a way to make money from it too. However, establishing a career out of your passion can take time and money. So, it’s often a choice of which do you want the most – a degree or a career you’re passionate about. Studying a degree will mean that your passions may have to take a side line and you’ll probably leave college with a significant amount of debt.

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Gap Year

Just because you didn’t get into college this year, it doesn’t mean you can’t try again next year. In the meantime, you could use the time you have to travel the world and gain some more insight about life and yourself. This is an option many students are voluntarily taking. One, because it’s a break from studying, and two, because travelling has a way of maturing you that college just can’t offer. Being out in the world, on your own, will teach you things you can’t learn in a classroom. You’ll have the advantage of gaining some real life skills, which employers value highly. It will teach you to manage your finances well, be accepting of other ways of living and different cultures and you may change your mind entirely about what you want for the future. It’s likely that you’ll have to work while you’re travelling to ensure you have the money to live properly. Having those jobs on your resume, as well as an eventual degree, could put you ahead of the competition.

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Volunteer Work

Volunteering can be rewarding for many reasons. Perhaps you’ve lived with dogs your whole life and would like to volunteer at a dog rescue or you have a passion for working with children and would like to volunteer at a children’s charity. Although you may not be paid for your time, it doesn’t mean volunteer work isn’t worth doing. In fact, it can often open many doors. If you’re passionate about what you’re doing and enjoy giving back, it may be noticed. It’s not impossible to climb up the ladder and get offered a paid position. Even if it doesn’t amount to anything, volunteer work looks great on a resume. It shows you’re willing to work, even when you’re getting very little for it. Volunteering is also a great way to build character, and it teaches you to think positively about life.

Apprenticeship

Becoming an apprentice is like killing two birds with one stone. Firstly, you’ll be gaining qualifications and experience on the job, which is often more valuable than learning something in theory. Secondly, you’ll get paid for your work. It may not be much, but at least you’ll be earning something while you’re studying. Take a look at what’s on offer, like nursing vacancies. It also means you won’t have to pay to gain your qualifications. It’s the best way to become skilled at what you do because you don’t have the option of making mistakes. The only downside to an apprenticeship is that they’re becoming so popular, you often have to compete with large numbers if you want a spot.

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The Armed Forces

Many parents try to steer their teens away from joining the armed forces because they’re scared of the potential dangers. That’s understandable, but for many people, the armed forces is an ideal choice. Perhaps you enjoy fitness, have good coordination and quick reaction times. Maybe you thrive under pressure and believe you could serve your country well. If you’re willing to accept the fact that the job is dangerous and you may lose friends during your time serving, the army could offer you more than a job. It often becomes a second home too.

Whatever you decide, know that you have plenty of options.

3 Great Online Time Wasting Options

There are moments in life when there just isn’t anything to do. You’re stuck waiting at a bus station; your friends are taking longer than normal to come over; you’re supposed to be working or studying but you’ve embraced procrastination into your life. Hey, we all do it. Don’t feel bad.

You find yourself with - for whatever reason - a spare slice of time. The internet is in front of you. The entire knowledge that humanity has ever amassed is at your fingertips; think of what the science and arts masters of old would have done with such a portal! And then think: yeah, but… I just want to do something fun instead.

Again: we all do it. Sometimes you don’t want to learn; you don’t want to use the time productively to catch up on your emails; you just want to waste some time and clear your head for awhile. If that sounds familiar, then here are a few ideas to keep you busy without you actually being very busy at all.

Online Games

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Flash as a whole might have died out in popularity (coming across a website built entirely from Flash is an immediate “back” button dealbreaker, for most of us) but it does still have a use: games.

They’re free - well, if you ignore the many ads that might be flashing across the screen. They’re not complicated and in-depth like your normal gaming choices might be. You can start, stop, forget they exist, or spend many hours going through the same repetitive motions. Or you can chance your hand if you’re feeling lucky, by tracking down the best online casino and seeing if your luck is going to bear out. Or if you just want something simple, it’s pretty hard to turn down a classic like Bubble Shooter when you just want something to distract you.

Help Solve Cold Cases

Think you might be a detective in the making? Then you could help solve cold cases, thanks to the Murder Accountability Project. For the moment it just features US crimes, but given that some of the most famous crimes of all time have happened in the States, that shouldn’t deter you. You can hunt for clues, read old files, and see if you can come up with a theory no one else has.

Citizen Science

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Citizen science seeks to harness the power of the internet for good. All sorts of scientific fields are involved, outsourcing the bulk work that would otherwise be done by overqualified researchers who are best turning their brains elsewhere. There are plenty of studies online; there’s a good overview here at the BBC for some ideas. Some of the most popular projects have helped identify galaxies in deep space images, understand the way we perceive age for psychology, or helped to map the neural connections in the human brain.

If that all sounds like you need a lot of time - you really don’t. This is the kind of activity you can pick up, do for awhile, then put down. And for once, your procrastination will have actually been useful - it’s hard to say fairer than that!

Book Review: Real Artists Have Day Jobs

"The biggest myth we are fed as artists is that we need to sustain ourselves solely on our art."

I finished reading Real Artists Have Day Jobs recently, and it was a fun romp through various short essays on art, love, and life written by comedian Sara Benincasa.

Sara has a unique outlook on the world, which I appreciated. It's empathetic, social justice oriented, but also funny, relevant, and her writing easy to read. She writes in a conversational tone and explores a lot of her own story through the book. Everything from her struggles with her body, issues with anxiety, and journey with her career. All delivered in bite sized morsels. I really enjoyed that I could pick up the book and read a chapter or two then put it down. I tend to only have brief periods of time or so much attention to give so it worked out well that way.

The stories shared in this book are very genuine and aren't done in a way of sharing expertise on any topic; just one's person's experiences and what they think about them. It's a great way to go in the world that leaves room for growth, acknowledges shortcomings, and is more relatable. Someone who is so sure of themselves to ignore any new information is going to limit themselves to many possibilities to learn and do the best they can with whatever they're working on. Being open to a good, new story change create positive change in anyone. This book achieves just that.

As the title implies, the book emphasizes the idea that we can create and be artists without going headlong into trying to be an "artist" who lives off their creations. We can live in the world, work a "day job" and pursue our creative endeavors just the same as anyone else. It may even work better than way. This sentiment makes me think of another great book I've read, Steal Like an Artist.

I've seen a lot of people talk about this book online and I'm glad I finally got around to checking it out. I recommend you do too. 

Thanks for stopping by!

Get Your Summer Reading Sorted

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As we approach summer, it’s the perfect time to find some good books to read during the hot months. After all, with vacation season approaching, it gives us plenty of time to do some reading. In fact, there is nothing better than relaxing on your sunbed in the hot sun with a good book in your hand. But what books should make the pile for your holiday reads? I’ve compiled a few which you will love to read this summer. Therefore, here are some good novels which will get your summer reading sorted!

13 Reasons Why by Jay Asher

It appears that all everyone seems to be talking about at the moment is the Netflix series 13 Reasons Why. In fact, you will find online a wealth of articles with people giving their opinion on the series. After all, it’s definitely brought a tough subject to people’s minds as the series focuses on character Hannah Baker’s reasons for committing suicide. And the controversial series has been a surprising success. In fact, it’s been one of the most tweeted about programs of the year so far. And it might not come to anybody’s surprise that producer Selena Gomez revealed that there will definitely be a second series! However, if you are missing the series, and want to go back to where it all began, you should look at reading the original 13 Reasons Why novel by Jay Asher. After all, books are often a lot more thought provoking than TV shows. And if you are in the mood for a cry fest, it’s one book that should be on your radar. Of course, the book is hard going and intense. But it will definitely get you hooked from the start as it goes through the 13 reasons why she felt it was her only option and the people who let her down. If you haven’t seen the series, you still might want to consider reading the book which goes through tough topics. Just make sure you have plenty of tissues on the sunbed next to you while you read the book!

The Girl Who Knew Too Much by Amanda Quick

Author Amanda Quick came to the forefront after releasing best seller ‘Till Death Do Us Part. And now she’s back with a great summer read which is rising high on the charts for the summer. In fact, you will find her new novel The Girl Who Knew Too Much on the bestseller chart in a lot of the major stores. You can even get an online copy by getting some Barnes and Noble coupons which will make it a cheaper purchase. And if historical romance is your thing, it’s definitely a book which should be on your radar this summer! The new novel is set in the 1930’s and is full of glamor and scandal. In fact, it focuses on the Burning Cove Hotel where a famous actress is killed. And reporter Irene tries to find out the truth of what happened, alongside the owner of the hotel Oliver. The story progresses with the two revealing some very dark secrets which bring them closer together. It’s definitely a book which will have you hooked till the very end. And will transport you back to the 30’s while you are lying on your sunbed!

My Not So Perfect Life by Sophie Kinsella

Known for her Shopaholic series (and film which starred Isla Fisher), British author Sophie Kinsella has been coming back with best seller after best seller ever since. And the author doesn’t seem to be slowing down with another great book which should be added to your summer pile. My Not So Perfect Life is a great chick lit novel which will keep you occupied in the summer sun. The story focuses on Katie Brenner who is living in London and working for an advertising company. To keep pretenses up, she pretends to have the perfect life on Instagram (don’t we all). But in reality, she is stuck in a small flat and having to endure a long commute every day to a job with an awful boss. The story takes a twist when she has to return home and starts to help her family set up a glamping business. It’s a great story with many twists and turns along the way. And there is a nice romance side of the story too that will keep you hooked to the very end! There are also parts of the book which will see you laughing out loud, so be prepared for the funny looks from other beach goers!

And remember to get a good pair of sunnies. That way, you can keep reading even when the weather is scorching!

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